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whappy happy nea land! |
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My own spot to rant about my day.
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wWednesday, October 31, 2001 |
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Candle wax in an office doesn't smell right.
posted by
nea at 9:56 AM
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I'm very entertained with myself. I have my gypsy den all set up at work. Almost no one decorated their cubicle, and those who did are no where close to this craziness. I have sheet, quilts, afghans, scarves, candles, bottles, a "crystal ball" (AKA an upside-down goldfish bowl), pillows, and beads all combined into this craziness. My cubicle is near the main entrance to our office, so everyone is coming in and checking it out. It's fun. Plus the lack of space gives me an excuse to not do much work today. hee hee It's crazy what I do when Dave is out of town. Once I have pictures (of course my camera's batteries are dead) I will post them up somewhere. I decided to skip pumpkin carving this year, cuz it's no fun to carve a pumpkin alone and I won't be home tonight for trick-or-treaters. Instead, I will be playing with APhiO. woo-hoo!
As a side note, I'm becoming really good at reading palms. I've been doing a bunch of research online and gave a few people what they considered accurate readings today. This is good. I could use another useless talent.
posted by
nea at 9:53 AM
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wTuesday, October 30, 2001 |
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Today was hard. I had my first florist appointment today. I actually had to go in there and say, "No roses and nothing scented, my fiance's family is allergic." Of course the florist's favorite flower is lilac, which Dave's mother is deathly allergic to. She was totally going through all these pictures saying "This is no good, this won't work, we can't do this." I felt bad. I like all the flowers and want all this stuff and no one has pictures to show me. I have this feeling that no matter who I pick the flowers will be a surprise. I want to be able to see what I'm getting!!!!! argh.
I decided I have nothing much better to do tomorrow, so I'm going to attempt to win my company's cubicle decorating contest. I am going to be "Madame Olga, Useless Fortune Teller" with such lines as "You will meet someone this week" or "I see you work in advertising" (I work at an advertising firm.) My whole cubicle is going to be covered in blankets and sheets and pillows and scarves (hey, I'm improvising) which yes, I do plan on taking pictures of. This should be fun. Telling fortunes will also give me something to do, since I never have a whole lot to do at work. yeah!
posted by
nea at 7:46 PM
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wMonday, October 29, 2001 |
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I am happy. I have 224 megs of memory now, instead of 64. I would have a lot more if my dad's friend, Deni, (who is nuts in a depressing kind of way, but more on that later) could read and use common sense. I am still very grateful, but I worry sometimes. By the laws of Deni, I have 256+256+32 in my computer. Yes, I have an odd machine with three expansion slots. By the laws of the computer, I have 128+64+32. Guess who can read, the computer or Deni?
posted by
nea at 10:48 PM
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My comment section is finally working, after a switch from blogback to reblogger. The problem of the comment link being anywhere but where I wanted it to be is also resolved. So comment away, I would love to hear your responses!
posted by
nea at 4:05 PM
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I feel like I haven't woken up yet today. My eyes still have that slighty blurry, need to rub the sleep out of feeling. My head, as usual recently, hurts. It kinda feels like that just got up from a nap painful grogginess, but it doesn't go away.
I've been trying to figure out the source of this round of headaches. I think it may be too much time staring at a monitor, especially since my head hurts most when I've been websurfing all day. Dave thinks it's stress, especially about the wedding. This makes sense, figuring I keep having nightmares that the wedding is the next day, or the next weekend, and all that has been done is the stuff we are currently up to. It's very odd to wake up and convince myself that the wedding is MONTHS away, and we don't have to worry about things like favors and invitations and how the girls are wearing their hair. Yet the dreams continue. sigh.
I've been trying to find creative things to do at work instead of helping my coworkers. Any suggestions?
posted by
nea at 3:44 PM
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wFriday, October 26, 2001 |
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Another dream vignette, this one from last night:
I run into my exboyfriend, Brandon. We decide to go to this apartment, and hang out in his bedroom. (no, this is not going that way) We start talking and he tells me he's a computer programmer and that he knows all these languages. Now, this doesn't sound very strange to all of you who don't know the boy, but Bren is not very smart. Like he never was able to pass pre-algebra and took PE all four years of high school, instead of the required two, in order to get the A's and boost his GPA. So, in my dream, I'm like "Wow, you're actually know more than me about something?"
Brandon (which shocked look): "You don't know how to program?"
Me: "Not like you do."
End of dream. I'm not sure if for some reason I'm having feelings of geek inadequacy, which is scary, or if I'm subconsciously hoping that Brandon got himself into something besides doing theatre lighting for the community college back in HB.
posted by
nea at 3:54 PM
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I got to treat Ted like meat last night. I encourage you all to do the same, it's fun!
posted by
nea at 11:06 AM
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I have been having really vivid dreams recently, to the point where I felt like writing about them. Here's one:
Two nights ago, I had a typical post-September 11th nightmare. Dave and I had these three middle eastern looking roomates that we didn't know very well. They all seemed like nice normal guys though. Then, suddenly, one comes out of their bedroom, states his name like he's in an AA meeting (Hi, I'm Andy, and . . .) and tells us the funky remote in his hand is going to set off a bomb in our apartment. Dave and I and some other woman start convincing him not too, and then suddenly I ask "How long until the bomb goes off?"
He answers, "Two minutes."
So, of course we run out of the building, knocking on doors and pulling people out of the apartments. We get across the street and our apartment goes off in this ball of fire. Other buildings catch and we're watching this big inferno. My dreams skips to about two days later, when our building is just all steel beams (waking up I realized it looked a lot like the construction site on the next block) and Dave and I go to inspect it. The only wierd part is that the garage is okay. And, in my dream, I believe the firemen moved all our cars to the front of the gate to try and save them. Except they didn't open the gate. So every car in the garage are smashed up against the gate and each other. We try my car and it runs but is all smashed in the back and won't move.
End of dream. If I ever get my comments working you guys can post analysis.
posted by
nea at 9:40 AM
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wThursday, October 25, 2001 |
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So for once I got some recognition from my department. We had a meeting yesterday, and during it I got the total pat on the back and here have an envelope manuever. My co-worker, La Tanya (AKA La Tijera La Brea La Cienega, but that's another story) got one too, and after the meeting we both looked. Hoped for cash (my job does not pay very well) but got two tickets to Sea World. Shamu, here we come!
Oh, in a random attempt to improve my English, which is totally going down hill due to a combination of not talking to anyone all day and attempting to learn French, I'm trying to only use grammatically correct writing on here. This will be hard, and may be really annoying for people who are used to a more casual writing style. However, I need to keep acting like a smart, educated college graduate and with my job that is quite hard.
posted by
nea at 11:49 AM
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wTuesday, October 23, 2001 |
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Tales of the Obsessive-Compulsive
When I get really bored at work and am sick of being online, I usually start cleaning. I create a nice, neat desk with all the old papers in the recycling bin, all the pens in the pen drawer, everything on my desk dusted, etc. Some people would consider this behavior to be anal, but I think it is nice to have a clean and orderly cubicle. Today the boredom has stretched out much too far. In my desk is now a box of large paper clips. This in itself is not very interesting. But in said box the paper clips are lined up, all perpendicular to the width of the box, in alternating rows of wide part up and wide part down. The rows are perfectly lined up on top of each other, and there are five rows in all.
This worries me.
posted by
nea at 4:09 PM
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um, if anyone can get my comment link to be after the time of each post instead of at the end of the day, let me know. this is the best i've gotten after some SERIOUS messups to the page, the worst being when the posting space was only allowing 6 characters. help!
posted by
nea at 10:16 AM
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another day at work with not much to do. it's kinda funny, last month i bitched about having so many invoices (my file cabinet was totally full) but at least i was busy. for this month i have maybe a third as many (less than one drawer in file cabinet full) and work is so easy. and boring. i need something interesting to do!
as many of you probably read, saturday we went bridesmaid dress shopping. poor pao pao. my sister was just throwing her in and out of the sample dresses. so many dresses. ones with little straps, no straps, one piece, two pieces, beads, halters . . . what cracks me up is that diana probably tired on more bridesmaid dresses than i did wedding dresses. i went through maybe 20, said "ok, i like this one." and that was that. on the other hand, i have four girls who have to pick one dress they like. and one of them is my sister. this may take awhile.
posted by
nea at 9:58 AM
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wFriday, October 19, 2001 |
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lalalala, cleaning up code, lalalala.
i didn't realize how much crap was sitting in my template until i started cleaning out stuff. "hi, i'm going to make an empty table on the right side of the page!" whatever, it's not like i could have made this from scratch so i'm grateful. i just don't understand useless code. it's kinda like those special hidden features in programs, like the flight simulator in excel. why take up the space?
posted by
nea at 11:59 AM
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does anyone else find the irony in this?
posted by
nea at 11:41 AM
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neil has been bugging me to blog, so here's a story of my crappy night last night.
if you don't already know, dave and i have both been sick all week. and yesterday dave was nasty sick. like puking, snot everywhere, hasn't shaved in four days sick. so i come home from work, make sure dave is still alive, and just sit with him for awhile. by like 6:30, i start getting hungry.
me "dave, i'm hungry. what do you want for dinner?"
dave "i don't know. i'm not hungry. just make yourself dinner."
this goes on for awhile and finally i decide that dave really isn't hungry and doesn't want dinner. he keeps stating that he's fine, don't worry, blah blah blah. so i go look in the kitchen to check out my options. i hate cooking for just myself. it's a total waste of time, since it's just as easy to cook for two or four people as it is for one. so i give up.
me "i'm going to burger king at 7."
dave "you want me to come?"
me "yeah."
now dave, who has been totally saying that he's not hungry and doesn't want dinner and all this, decides he wants taco bell. i'm thinking, "and why are we not cooking dinner since you're suddenly hungry?" normally i would say too bad, i'm going to burger king and you can walk the three blocks to taco bell, but i decide to be nice. even though the only reason i was going out was to get dinner for myself cuz dave wasn't hungry, i decide i'll be all nice and take dave to taco bell and buy him dinner. so, in order to compensate for the total inconvience (though not really) we go to taco bell first so his food can get cold and not mine.
we get food, we pay, i hand dave food. fine. i notice dave is trying to put my wallet in my purse, as well as hold his food and balance a large drink. now, remember dave is sick and on drugs. i ask him to be careful, if he needs help. of course he thinks he had a handle on the situation. this lasts for a whole 30 seconds.
"boom! oh fuck!" the extra large rasberry iced tea hits the floor of my car, on its side, and spills EVERYTHING. was this unexpected? no. was i really pissed off but couldn't yell at dave cuz he's sick? yes.
my food ended up being cold anyway, and now my car stinks of putrid sweet rasberries. life sucks.
posted by
nea at 9:23 AM
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wThursday, October 11, 2001 |
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have time, but realized that my poem "kill my buyer, kill my buyer" (in the spirit of Mr. Robinson's "Kill My Landlord") might not be the best thing to be writing at work. hopefully i'll get to it next time i'm online.
25 hours until we leave for vegas!!!
posted by
nea at 3:24 PM
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today's rant is lots of little thoughts.
39 pledges last night! it's like gamma class all over again. i'm so proud.
ted, it's not your fat tracker. and you may be single, but i'm getting married. much much worse.
my skirt is too big and falling off. i find this funny since i haven't actually lost any weight, just a whopping 1.1% of my body fat.
if i have time later i will be writing a poem about my frustration with the buyers here at Carat.
posted by
nea at 10:10 AM
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wWednesday, October 10, 2001 |
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my mom called me yesterday to let me know she'd found my blog. this made me realize how much this thing is like a public diary.
on a separate note, last night made me realize how much of an APhiO nerd i am. diana was writing this thing on friendship for the pledge manual, and calls me asking if i can remember a quote in one of the ceremonies. no, i don't have the things memorized, though i probably should by now. it was worse. i said "oh, hold on a minute" and found my personal copy of the ritual handbook. yes, that's right, i keep handy copies of the bylaws and rituals. yes, this is sad. at least now i can use the excuse of being an advisor to cover my otherwise embarrassingly geeky dedication. ;)
posted by
nea at 9:13 AM
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wMonday, October 08, 2001 |
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oh yeah, last night also reminded me of one of Peter's Laws: When in doubt, think!
posted by
nea at 10:04 AM
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I feel like I'm starting to become body obsessed. Part of this, I'm sure, is due to the fat rant that Dave and I had last night. You can read more about that here. And part of it is due to the upcoming wedding, which is no longer that forever year and a half away, but that gotta get things done seven months away. But I'm starting to get sick of it.
I miss drinking seven fruity sweet drinks in a night and not worrying about the calories in the fruit juice or liquor. Now, I totally have nights where I don't drink cuz I don't want the calories. Neil and Greg would be shocked.
I miss thinking that I eat pretty normally. I never ate horribly. I hate cream soup and sauces, I don't like fried chicken, and I have never been a fast food or junk food junkie. But I've come to realize that not eating horribly just isn't enough. I totally lay awake at night thinking of the crap that was hiding in my dinner or portion control. This drives me nuts. And dammit, take away my meat and give me back my carbs!
Now, I am not overly concerned about taking this too far. I'm just plain not that girly, and can't imagine spending hours on clothes, hair, makeup, diet pills, or any of that stuff. I find people who worry about whether their lips will look fuller wearing the Apple Pink or the Apple Rose lipstick silly. And I'm not worried about becoming anorexic or bulimic. I get way too drained after about an hour and a half of working out, and I know damm well what it is like to have sore throat and no voice from puking (I could post an explaination, but I think the number 21 is enough). But with the wedding I am starting to have way too many things to freak out about, and my body really doesn't need to be one of them.
posted by
nea at 10:01 AM
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wFriday, October 05, 2001 |
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more code fixing . . .
posted by
nea at 4:09 PM
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rush week always seems to be a time of reflection for me. what's changed in my life over the past term, how old i'm getting, how things change.
i'm realizing that i don't fit in with college students nearly as well anymore. conversation with mary last week:
me: "Hey, the new Ralphs is open!"
mary: "Where?"
me: "It's in the old Macy's building."
mary: "Macy's? We have a Macy's?"
At this point I realize that the Macy's was closed over two years ago and first and second year students were never here when it was open. Same for Papa's Pizza, which used to be my favorite, and a time when there was no boba in Westwood.
Info nite on Wednesday was another one of those moments. Dave is talking to a prospective pledge and asks her how she heard about APhiO. She mentions her older brother was in APhiO. Upon questioning, we find out this is the infamous John Chen (infamous only because founding class used to talk about him all the time and I never met the boy). When I pledged, he had just graduated. But to hear her talk, it sounds like it was years and years ago. Oh wait--that was years and years ago.
I feel old.
posted by
nea at 4:06 PM
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you know it's a slow day when your coworker starts advertising that she will be whistling a 20 minute song beginning at 4:15 pm. fellow whistlers are encouraged to join in.
posted by
nea at 3:57 PM
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wTuesday, October 02, 2001 |
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note: i'm sorry if the post below sounds totally egotistical. it's not meant to be.
so i had this discussion with both dave and ted the other night about my job, and life in general. i've slowly woken up to the fact that there are average and dumb people in the world. not like mentally disabled, but just plain not smart. i still can't believe i was sheltered to this fact.
let me try and explain how this happened. from kindergarten on, i have been in GATE (G&T, gifted, honors, AP, whatever) classes. furthermore, i'm used to being at the top of my classes. at my elementary school, which was the "gifted" school in our district, i literally did not talk to anyone who was not in the GATE program. almost all my friends, both in school and out, were in honors. by high school, the few other friends i had were on teams with me, where we would talk about the sport and intelligence didn't matter. the rest of my friends that weren't in honors i didn't really talk to anymore. i never figured out why that happened until now, either. i always considered the people getting low Bs and Cs in my classes as the "normal" ones. . . oh my god was i wrong! you'd think that i would have figured this out sooner. i mean, how can you make it 22 years old and not really realize what the average person's intelligence level is?
after high school i went to UCLA. i was exposed to huge new groups of people. i met people who were happy with Cs and partied all the time and did things i thought were really stupid. i met people who were handicapped and mentally disabled, who needed a lot of help in their studies. i also met people who were complete geniuses and could run theoretical circles around me. at UCLA, i felt pretty average. i got mostly B+s, partied a little, and had friends in many different majors. i totally thought that the students and professors at UCLA represented the people out in the real world. once again, i was wrong.
but now i work full-time. and, to be honest, this is not a job for smart people. i mean, you need to have a basic grasp of the computer programs (though the last girl they hired came into the job computer illiterate) and some organizational skills, but that's it. and people in my job find it challenging! fulfilling! a life-long career! at first this just plain seemed insane to me that these women (it's almost all women in my department) were content in their positions. i thought that i must be either surrounded by people looking for easy and boring jobs, or ones that had mental defficiencies and really couldn't do anything more challenging. i was wrong on this as well.
i've realized that these aren't deranged, lazy, or dumb people around me. they're average. totally average people in average jobs. this scares me still, but it's true. i've also realized that i am smarter than women three times my age that have way more life experience than i do, and am probably brighter than most of the workers in this office. i now the whole three of you reading this are probably going "well, duh nea" but i really didn't know before now. this is going to take me a long time to get over, but i hope that someone out there understands how hard this concept is to grasp for me.
posted by
nea at 9:22 AM
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